So, Charnwood is over. I feel myself missing it now, and eager for the next one. This is direct contrast with how I felt in the weeks leading up to it. Perhaps I felt the same way at the end of Charnwood 2011, I can’t now remember.
This year has been manic, and I’ve found myself busier than ever before. As outlined in previous posts, this has had several negative consequences. But now, on the light side of Charnwood, with the sun shining, a beer in front of me, and the sound of the waves breaking against the beach, I have time to take stock and see things outside of the red mist.
Up until arriving at Charnwood, I wanted nothing more than for it to be over. The same has been true of most camps this year. This sounds awful saying it out loud, but that’s the way it was. During Charnwood, in fact, as soon as we started setting up camp (and, likewise with previous camps), this was turned on its head. Camps are all about the young people; their enjoyment of them and learning from them. So perhaps, when that’s what gives one the most pleasure, it’s not so odd to feel down during the preamble. When dealing with paperwork and cheques, one feels a detachment from the event, and, when this takes a large portion of your free time (free time I could have spent making the Scouts/Cubs programmes better), it rankles somewhat.
I realise now (and especially after being told off in The Woggle Inn on the last night of Charnwood by Sharon) that I could have helped myself by delegating and sharing more. The reason for my not doing so was that I tended to leave things too late, then do everything myself rather than burden others due to my lateness. I’ve also tended to just do things myself because it’s easier. But, when you have more than one person’s worth of work, that method is always going to cause problems.
Sorry if this sounds at all moany or self-serving. It’s not meant to be. Well, it is meant to be self-serving, in a way, but hopefully not moany. It’s meant to be positive – I was in rather a dark place, but I’m not now, and I can see what I need to do to ensure it doesn’t happen again. It’s meant to be self-serving, in as much as I’m laying out my thought process over the last few months to hopefully learn lessons from it.
I had a fantastic time at Charnwood, mainly because the Scouts did, but also because we had a great team of leaders. Now, on the other side of it, I’m once again sure that I couldn’t be anything else other than a Scout (and Cub) leader.
By the way, the title is from The Doors’ tune.
Also, I hasten to add that my workload was as nothing compared with many on Charnwood. So I do feel bad about posting this in that respect.